Lifestyle

I Love, Therefore I Am

Yesterday I had to write something about the coming Valentine’s Day for our magazine. So I sat down, opened my pc, and started this article. Honestly I have never really appreciated this Valentine thing. I have always disliked the commercialised side of it – everything rapidly changes to red and pink. Windows of the shops and markets explode with hearts and balloons, immediately around me there are always massive campaigns for buying stupid things for less. Which doesn’t change the fact that are stupid. People start thinking how to be more original and what to do to surprise their partners and loved ones. It is extremely unnecessary fuss and the more it gets on the worse I feel. This happens every time around 14th of February, including yesterday. So I tried to write something nice and positive but my sarcastic mind was not working in this direction. I was frustrated and extremely unhappy. I started thinking, maybe there was something wrong with me. As if my head was blocked and my mind was stuck there forever. I closed the laptop. There was nothing, absolutely nothing good I could write about this occasion. The parody of Valentine’s day picture, where there is a couple kissing, but then you notice a drunk boy, kissing a bottle of beer in the back, didn’t want to leave my brain. I went out for a walk, I bought ingredients to cook, I cooked, I served the dinner I cooked to my family. Kids went to sleep. The need to do my article was in my head regardless all the other activities. So it was around 11 p.m. when I sat down again in front of the Mac book and tried one more time. Still nothing! I got angry on myself and decided to leave it. After all it can go without that stupid article, it is my magazine after all… I went to bed. And right there in bed I opened my eyes and it hit me! Finally the answer of Why this frustration was all about came to my mind within a blink of my eyes! I was in shock and couldn’t believe it. My inner self was talking to me like never before and for the first time in my life I realised the meaning of St Valentine’s Day. My heart was full of gratitude and happiness like I was in front of the Ganges River, ready to be baptised! I rushed to the kitchen, my so called “office” at home, I took a glass of water and before I finished it I started writing. The words were coming from my heart and even if my brain was trying to lough I kept on going.

Love is everywhere around us, in every little thing, in every word of affirmation, in every small gift of appreciation, in every smile of confirmation. It is there for us every time we say “hello, how are you”, or “goodbye, see you later”. Love comes from inside out and it is here to stay, to guide us and to make us believe. Rene Descrates says “Cogito ergo sum” – “I think, therefore I am”, I say “I love, therefore I am”.

Hatred never took anybody anywhere, but love did. (here my brother will maybe joke and say love usually takes me to the pharmacy, but this is not the case). The more I was thinking , the more I believed that what was coming out on the blank page was the truth. I got excited and started to bring memories from my childhood, surrounded by my family and people I truly love and care about. Then I thought of my girls, sleeping peacefully in bed, my husband and my friends. I thought of all the people I care and I appreciate in this life. I was feeling enlightened and grateful as if I have lost the weight I wanted and I could finally fit in my favorite dress. That dress I always had but something was never enough with it – either the zip didn’t go to the end, or it was not ironed properly. We tend to feel like this about love. It is like we have it, it is always there, but we tend to complain too much and pay attention to the small difficulties. We keep on finding excuses and we search for the best occasion to put that dress on so we can shine bright, but the time never seems to come. And we leave it in the wardrobe. We do the same with our emotions and feelings. We put them in the wardrobe and don’t show them until the perfect time comes. But hey, how long should we wait for? And exactly like that zip was not right, our issues seem to be more important and brought out instead of everything else that matters. We tend to complain as if we always need something more, there is always something missing, the picture is not full enough. How many of you, reading this article, are completely happy and love to the full every day? – none. (if somebody – PM me, please). Either it is some job issues, or kids issues or partners issues or some other issues. And we never feel good enough to love completely, like that zip on the back which never reaches the end. I realised what St. Valentine’s day stands for, and no, it should not be only this day, but at least we can use the occasion to sit down and think about those we love.

The only thing that gathers us together and is equial to all of us it time. We must be total fools not to use it wisely. The wisest we can do is to spread and give love. Unconditionally, love and respect to life and all the miracles we have every single day. The sooner we understand it – the better!

The greatest thing one can ever learn is to love and be loved in return!

Happy Valentine’s Day!

3 Comments

  1. I loveeee this article

  2. Ventsislava

    Awesome!!! ❤

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