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Why are all my clothes named after humans?

In fact, Warby Parker is all about being old. That whole hipster movement with speakeasies and reclaimed wood? Warby made bank off that trend. They named the company by combining two Jack Kerouac characters, and continue to sell 1920s-1940s charm by naming designs after literary and cultural figures. You can wear Roosevelt on your face, or Beckett, or Daisy.

Percey reminds me of a snobby British publishing heir who will never make his or her own living. Also, it’s the name of Governor Ratcliffe’s spoiled dog in Pocahontas, which is basically the same thing.

I just needed eyeglasses, and these looked cute. But apparently I got a persona along with it. Even if he is a brat.

So, when did fashion become personified? Since when do you need to “relate” to your scarf or lipstick on a personal level, to bring you joy? When did Marie Kondo get into the naming business? (JK, but seriously she should look into it.)

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