Name – Ali Smith
Nationality – British
Occupation – Behavior and toxic relationship coach ( Narcissistic abuse specialist );
Trauma Resilience Coach and EMDR therapist;
Corporate consultant and educator – Trauma resilience and stress management awareness.
Countries lived in – Born in South Africa, now live in UK . I have been living here for 22 years now.
Hello Ali, please tell us more about your coaching programs.
I am a trauma informed coach and therapist and my belief is that it is often unresolved trauma that holds us back in life as it is often the root cause of so many of our limiting beliefs and self sabotaging behaviors.
My aim is to raise awareness and understanding around the effects of trauma in our lives and to help women to process and reframe past traumatic events that may still trigger difficult emotions and cause them to react and behave in destructive ways.
I specialize in helping ambitious women to recognize and heal the symptoms of complex post traumatic stress including how to avoid and recover from toxic and abusive relationships and codependent relational patterns.
My work currently includes the following:
1 ) 4 month 1 to 1 transformational coaching packages for healing ongoing stress and anxiety and overwhelm, post traumatic stress, effects of previous adversity or trauma and / or effects of toxic relationships ( 2 x 1 hour sessions per month including nervous system regulation, EMDR , hypnotherapy and trauma informed coaching PLUS workbooks and WhatsApp support );
2 ) Space to thrive Success Academy – Group coaching transformational program for business owners , high fliers and entrepreneurs;
Starts 3rd February 2022. This is an 8 week trauma- informed , transformational group coaching experience for business owners who wish to end self – sabotaging survival behaviours that are preventing them from progressing in their businesses
3 ) Love doesn’t hurt – 12 weeks group healing program to recover from and reframe toxic , manipulative and abusive relationship dynamics
Thrive after emotional abuse, betrayal trauma and codependency in this intensive ,12 week, trauma – informed program designed for women and men who find themselves in destructive power struggles within their relationships . Starts 4th April 2022
4 ) Trauma – informed bookclub;
Trauma informed bookclub is an online monthly membership which has been designed to help leaders and business owners become trauma – informed
We meet twice a month on zoom to discuss and debate the books we have read and have quarterly presentations from guest experts covering all aspects of trauma;
5 ) Stress management workshops for corporates
I provide two day stress management and trauma informed awareness workshops to corporate companies
What is your personal story? What made you chose this career path?
I suffered from PTSD following a series of traumatic events in my life, including a terrorist attack and suicide of my best friend. Unable to find targeted help from talking therapists and counsellors prompted me to embark on a journey of research which was when I discovered EMDR which proved to be a game changer for me in healing PTSD. The adverse events in my life as well as my patterns of attracting toxic relationships, led to my decision to retrain as a trauma – informed coach and EMDR therapist and to later specialize in becoming narcissism informed specialist.
How can we deal with a narcissist? Are there quick hints you could share with our readers in order to protect themselves in the every day environment?
Narcissists are deeply insecure and have a desperate underlying need for power and control. They have a very low ability to express empathy and have zero respect for peoples boundaries.
Their abusive behavior makes them feel in control and they thrive on getting “supply“ from those whom they can dominate.
– The first step is to realize that you CANNOT fix or change a narcissist and it is not your responsibility to do so;
– The second step is to realize that you need to have firm, strong boundaries in place, make your expectations clear from the start as to how you want to be treated and STICK to these boundaries. Narcissists have a sense of entitlement which means that they will PUSH the boundaries. Let your no be a clear and resounding NO;
– Third top tip is to keep emotion OUT of your interaction with a narcissist. Communicate in a clear, succinct, matter of a fact way. Don’t share your heart – this does not work. Stick to the minimal facts;
– Fourth top tip – TRUST your gut feeling – Look out for the red flags from the start – realize that an abusive relationship is cyclical. If you think you are being abused, if it feels wrong – it probably IS ! Going no contact of you is ALWAYS the best strategy. If your circumstance are more complex there are other strategies which I teach in my program.
Do you define yourself as an entrepreneur? What was the hardest part in establishing your coaching business?
Yes I define myself as an entrepreneur because I believe in having multiple streams of income and always looking at different ways of doing things. The hardest part in starting my coaching business was knowing and getting clarity around my niche, becoming visible and working out the best system for getting a steady stream of clients. This is something I now incorporate in my trauma informed success academy group coaching program.
Tell us more about your mission and your vision in your own company?
My vision is to see every business leader becoming trauma informed both in the corporate space and in the B to C environment. I don’t believe this awareness should just be limited to coaches and therapists. We live in a traumatised society, more so now with the pandemic than ever before! Therefore its important that those who are in a position of influence can recognise the symptoms of stress and trauma in those they manage.
What did help you the most in your recovery journey from CPTSD?
I tried various forms of therapy. The most helpful for me without a doubt was EMDR which was the catalyst for me becoming qualified in it.
What is the most common problem you help your clients solve?
I help my clients to change their behaviour from self – sabotage ( survival behaviour ) in their businesses to resourceful behaviour through my trauma work.
I also help them to recognize and stop attracting toxic relationships which helps them to find real love by attracting the right partner.
Most of my clients see massive breakthroughs in their businesses – earning more money and becoming more visible and attracting the right type of clients as well as finding their dream partners!
What would you like people to remember your work with?
My strap-line is “ Courage to thrive “. If we have the courage to do the inner work we will thrive in life! I am also a Christian and believe that I am guided by the Holy Spirit. I sometimes get silent messages and insights about specific clients when I am working with them which is super cool. That is the true fuel and healing power that underlines all of my work.
Who is your best client – a short description so IWC members can relate?
Business owner wanting to expand her business to the next level of success. She knows she has some inner healing and reframing of past experiences to do. She may be struggling with lack of clarity, feeling frozen or overwhelmed due to ongoing adversity in her life which is affecting how she shows up in her business. Perhaps she is in an unhealthy relationship and feels stuck, confused and lacking confidence in love. Willing to do the work to change the patterns of conditioning.
How the pandemic affected your work and lifestyle?
The pandemic has been good for my business. I have connected with clients based in LA, Sweden and Australia as well as the UK. People are needing connection more than ever which has meant there are many more people on social media. I have missed socialising as much and really value in – person events. The pandemic has also made me aware of and appreciate the British countryside. I now go for long walks and have discovered a river run which I love! This is something I never used to do before.
Do you think having a social network only for women is useful for their business and growth? Why?
I love the idea of women supporting each other in business. Some of my greatest learnings and encouragement this past year have come from other female entrepreneurs. It is also really useful knowing where to find others who have a slightly different skillset to you.
How IWC members can get in contact with you?
Connect with me HERE on my website: